Tag Archives: questions

3 better questions than ‘How are you?’

Posted on April 9, 2012 by | 3 Comments

Last week I offered three options for how to answer the question “How are you?” If you are initiating a conversation, you can do better than asking that question too.

If you are a manager, your greeting can set the tone for your conversation with employees and show interest in their work. Greet employees with one of these approaches:

  1. Focus on the positive. Ask “What’s the best thing that has happened (today/this week)?” That prompts the other person to recognize the good things and may offer you an opportunity to praise your employee for an accomplishment.
  1. Offer your service. “How can I make this a great day for you?” Clear a roadblock for your employee or assist that person with a challenge.
  1. Seek information. “What would you like me to know today?” Encourage team members to speak up and share what they know. Perhaps a piece of equipment is malfunctioning or a new process is yielding exceptional results. You’ll learn more when you ask open-ended questions that specifically invite employees to share information and opinions with you.

What’s your favorite question to start a conversation?

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3 ways not to waste ‘How are you?’

Posted on April 2, 2012 by | 2 Comments

The greeting “How are you?” is so standard that the reply often becomes perfunctory. It doesn’t have to be.

The question presents an opportunity. Here are three ways to make your response meaningful:

  1. Project a positive attitude.It’s hard not to smile when the response to “How are you?” is a big grin and “If my life were any better I’d have to hire someone to help me enjoy it!”You don’t have to go that far, though. Even a simple “Super!” is better than “Fine.” Years ago I adopted the response “Peachy!” for a few weeks. Things actually weren’t going well for me, but my response was honest—No one made the connection that a late frost had severely damaged that year’s peach crop.
  1. Brag a bit. If calling attention to your accomplishments is difficult for you, this is a subtle way to make sure your efforts don’t go unnoticed. When someone asks “How are you?” say something like “I’m thrilled today, because my team closed a deal that we have been working or for three weeks” or “I’m excited, because I just learned that I’ll be serving on the Employee Rewards Committee.”
  1. Lead into a request. Respond and move the conversation along at the same time. Couple your reply with why you are approaching the other person. Example: “My day will be perfect if you can …”

Come back next week to discover three better questions than “How are you?”

What’s your favorite response to “How are you?”

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When inquisitive turns to annoying

Posted on August 15, 2011 by | Leave a comment

By Jaimy Ford

After a recent encounter with a 7-year-old who asked far too many questions, I started to evaluate my patience for people who ask a lot of questions. See, I found myself becoming increasingly agitated with a child because the questions seemed never ending and often silly, for example, “Why do you let your dog outside?” Huh?

That prompted me to think about the types of questioners I meet on a regular basis and the reaction I have to them:

  • The devil’s advocates. “What if that doesn’t work?” or similar questions fall out of their mouths fast and furiously. In some cases, they’re outstanding people to have in your circle. They force you to think about back-up plans. They’re helpful but only if they follow their questions with proposed solutions. Otherwise, their questions often just feel like they are challenging plans or ideas for the sake of it, and that is counterproductive.
     
  • The “just-trying-to-make-conversation’ers.” I know a slightly socially awkward couple who bombards you with questions the moment they see you. It can feel like an inquisition at worst and an interview at best. I’ve realized that it’s their way of making conversation, and while the Q&A session can get overwhelming, I’ve stopped letting it get to me.   
     
  • The lazies. Those people don’t want to look for answers or figure things out on their own, so they ask questions—about everything. They’re known for frequent visits, emails or calls to ask you questions when they could easily find the information on their own. Those types of questioners are perhaps the most frustrating to me. They’ve decided their time is more valuable than mine, and that is just plain rude.
     
  • The truly inquisitive. Some people have a thirst for knowledge. Their questions come from a good place, and because of them, I try my best to see the value in every question and keep my frustration in check.

In the words of many excellent teachers and parents “There are no stupid questions.” For me, the verdict is still out on that one. What do you think?

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